Monday, February 14, 2011

Love is a many splendored thing...

Love has so many facets to it -and not the least of which is loving yourself.  I wonder if that is why all of my major life changes consists of events surrounding Valentine's Day...  My last big step was five years ago when I joined TOPS.  Oscar Wilde said, "To love oneself is the beginning of a life-long romance."  He would know...

Today... Well, today I went and met...  dunh dunh dunh...  HER. 

The counselor -I went and met her.  After a major panic attack in the parking lot I went in to the meeting -and found out I had gotten the time wrong so I started totally insecure and on the defensive.  Parr for the course I guess!  But she took me in anyway and did a great job of making me feel comfortable and then sneak attacked.

Guess what I found out when I got in there -she was NICE.  It was terrible, I actually like her and I think that means I have to go back.  She doesn't think I am crazy -(ha!  She just doesn't know me well enough yet -we will give her a bit!) and I think she might actually help.  Our goals are simple, measureable and realistic. 

I think we will see how it goes...

On a side note, HUNGER has been a big thing (imagine that, since I have food issues) and my friend Lynn has been blogging about it, which makes me think about it, which makes it come up more in day to day -kind of funny how that works.   Anyway...so I started thinking about how few of us actually know what hungry for food feels like because we are so caught up in the TIMING of eating (breakfast at 7am, lunch at noon, dinner at 6pm) or the social cues ("Meet me for a drink, for lunch, for breakfast, for ice cream, whatever) that we just don't actually feel HUNGER for food.

I think we feel hunger for other things -contact from other people, attention....  We crave human contact and we replace it with food or drink or gambling -whatever our "weakness" is...  The reverse of that is also true with how we SHOW love.  Let me cook for you, bring you a casserole, bake you a cake...

Today for my 2nd grader's Valentine's Day party, I was room mom designate.  I brought the treats in -and I brought carrots and grapes.  The kids got a smidgeon of candy too but not like the other classrooms that got cupcakes or pizza or donuts.  Some of the kids were disappointed at first -but the majority LOVED it.  I loved that my own child did not come home so hyped up on sugar that my day was miserable...  And it made it possible for me to say yes to the candy from the goody bag.  Some of it...

My point?  Providing an unexpected treat -is sometimes saying something like -Let's go for a walk and let's go for salad bar or workout or something.  Or curl up with me and read -or just sit and talk to me.  Or here -have carrots and grapes...

We as a society need to adjust our expectations and try to identify the hungers we have and meet them with the right tools for the job.  The tendency to overindulge in one area while being lacking in another is a dangerous loss of balance....  And contagious...

Now I am the first to admit I am fabulous at instigating this for everyone else...  Not so much for myself.  If I was, now I wouldn't be blogging, would I?

1 comment:

  1. Ohh, that's verging on a comment on society as a whole- we try to feed our appetites with cheap, high calorie stuff, only to find out thatyou can't fill your life with chinese plastic junk, just like junk food doesn't really fill you up.

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